Last nights clothing, that delicious look of confusion and a waft of regret. They keep their eyes to the ground and walk back and forth between flats a few times before remembering where they live and what their name is.
Above: this Leftover Monster seems to rolling around on the floor to save his precious findings, cute. |
5. The Leftover Monster
Taking university life fully in their stride the Leftover Monster will destroy your 3 day old McDonald's chips... and have no shame in doing so.
6. Freshers Flu
It's one of those things that before being a student you laughed at with despair. Obviously such a fucking stupid concept couldn't amount to reality, right? WRONG. You arrive to your first lectures and are greeted by a cacophony of hungover, unwashed teenagers spluttering on your unopened notebook. At first you turn to them with disgust, then before you know it you're wiping your dribbling nose on the sleeve of your jumper. Sexy.
"I'm not even on this course I've just come for the BEVVIES" |
7. The One Who Took Advantage Of The Free Alcohol
Hats off to this person. They're stumbling around your 'Meet and Greet' harboring a minimum of 4 glasses of wine under their arms. Safety precautions of course, the free alcohol will run out at some point.
8. Tesco Value Fancy Dress
As we come to learn, there really is no shame in Tesco value products. However, when we apply the same budget to fancy dress events, the outcome is much (much) worse than a 42p pack of toilet roll. From males in thongs on initiations to socials gone wrong, 'tesco value fancy dress' really epitomises the struggle students have with these nights.
The dress code: Smurf
The student: 'I'm going to get my mate to rub a blue crayon over some parts of my body and then shove a nappy on my head'
The dress code: Back To School
The student (FEMALE): 'I'll wear a skirt so short you'll hardly be able to see it, put my hair in bunches and wear shit loads of makeup'
The student (MALE): 'I fucking love uni'
The dress code: Beach Party
The student (FEMALE): 'A bikini will do'
The student (MALE): 'I fucking love uni.'